This rap sheet is posted in http://www.newmidwest.com/forum, news:rec.sport.pro-wrestling.info a newsgroup that many wrestling organizations could utilize to spread info about their shows but don't, and the archive of all the ones I've written are stored in http://abermud.tripod.com/rapsheet.

Well should I even include all the fuss that occurred over the past month. Some of it is appropriate for this column, some isn't, and some of it is kind of embarrassing to me. Hmmm...I'm gonna put that on hold for the time being and get to the show, which is well super sized this month. I shall include this however; this show is being held in memory of Alexis Homeier, daughter of Jamie Homeier aka Hot Valet and niece of Rip Mystic. But despite the tragedy from a year ago, there is joy today with the newest addition to the family born a couple days after the end of the previous show.

Your ring announcer is Jimmy "The Bruiser" Osbourne, your commentary team is Rick, Jack and Josh. Jimmy introduces Majorie Watson, but Rip Mystic comes to the ring. Some loud girl was sitting behind me and screaming like crazy for Doug Fraze. Rip Mystic wakes up the crowd, someone shouts lets hear it for 3cw, no kidding. He says he's got a bad back injury and won't be able to complete for a while. It was hard for him to watch the tourney and not be able to wrestle. He's close to crying. He'll be out of action for a long time while he does rehab and will wrestle again sometime. He wasn't scheduled for the show and wasn't going to commentate, referee, or wrestle but wants to do something. Witchy then says after she talked to the doctors, uhhh...whatever happened to patient confidentiality? I've worked in a hospital, I've worked collecting health care data for statistics, doctors aren't supposed to just give out info to just ANYONE, including your employer. Witchy calls Rip a liar saying the people she talked to claim he'll never wrestle again. So you're saying a back injury never heals? Witchy claims he's milking the company getting a paycheck for doing nothing. Actually there's a bunch of stuff he can do for the company, booking, production, video, promotion, instruction, webpage work, just to name a few. Rip calls her a witch. She brings up that Rip's original injury wasn't wrestling related and he should had taken the month off before. You FORCED Rip into the match you moron! He tells her there's such as thing as a second opinion in medicine, she calls useless and FIRES HIM on the spot! Oh yeah, she really has the authority to fire her superior, that's gonna come back to REALLY burn your butt off. She has been taking lessons from Eric Bischoff when he fired Steve Austin, but that didn’t last did it? Impeach Witchy NOW! And they've went so far to remove Rip's bio and links from the site as well as replace every instance of Rip Mystic with [name deleted]. Well, if you're gonna push this nonsense, I will be replacing every instance of Majorie Watson with [name deleted]. Just so no one forgets who I'm talking about, I'll add references to tools witches use in their craft. BTW, if [name deleted] with pointed hat was a manager of a MLB team or an NFL team and fired every person that got injured on the field, she'd be gone in less than an hour. Rip is pissed and chews out [name deleted] for her ungratefulness, rudeness, obnoxiousness, and outright disrespectfulness. [Name deleted] wants security to throw Rip in her cauldron or she's gonna fire them too. Guy Smith comes to the ring and orders Rip to get out. Someone shouts Guy Smith is a wussy! Rip rips his shirt off and is ready to fight, Real World Jeremy rushes to the ring to restrain him. [Name deleted] continues to cackle "I'll get you my pretty!" and says Rip's still fired. Guy runs his mouth at Jeremy off mike. RWJ tries to calm a very emotional Rip Mystic. "All Female" chant. Rip spits at Guy. Someone says Ms. Watson is a prostitute. Okay, that last comment needed the name left in. Guy gets the mike and says he can handle things. He tells RWJ to calm down champ, oh he's champ. Guy gets around to saying who his opposition is tonight, it's someone he had an altercation with a chair. RWJ takes the mike, he says he's glad Guy's finally gonna be a man and face him. Guy cuts him off and says I'm not wrestling you, I'm wrestling Stan Sallinger. STAN SALLINGER? Stan is ranked DEAD LAST at 0-3! Guy tried the lame excuse that El Pollo Loco was ranked lower than him, whatever. Summer in the City music hits and he comes out. Stan says stuff in a low voice in which I cannot hear, then mentions being in Legally Blonde II and his tag partner is tied up in the tourney, and he wanted to prove himself by fighting for the gold. RWJ says the fans are being cheated again, give me my d*** shot! [Name deleted] says Guy's fighting Stan and there's nothing you can do about it! Guy runs his mouth some more. Chicken chant. Stan points out he used to run this place and points to the signed contract and refers to a line on some page saying he has a special referee clause in there, so he's picking Real World Jeremy as the referee. RWJ accepts, [name deleted] and Guy are pissed. Sound in my section is just terrible. Turn the mikes up or something or speak LOUDER. The whole segment was a big miss-mash with a bunch of twisted and flawed logic that I could completely refute and make [name deleted] with crystal ball look even dumber than she is. Bustin' ain't easy, but whipping [name deleted] in a debate is EXTREMELY EASY!

Danger Doug Fraze (1-2) 6'6" 275lbs. Chicago, IL w/ New World Quinten & Emily Darling vs. "The Cruiserweight Redneck" Earl Grissom (5-6-0-1) 5'10" 170lbs., Rushville, IL - Classic Davey vs. Goliath match up, as Earl gives up nearly 100 pounds and a foot. Earl just got through evening his win-loss record when he got paired up against guys much taller than him. Doug has been dubbed "Fat Fraze" by Scotty Cash. Alright, let's see what the Body Mass Index calculator says...his body mass is 31.8 kg/m² which does make him obese. Doug has completely new entrance music with siren blaring...reminds me of someone with similar music that I can't think of. The girl behind me is a rapid Fraze fan and believes he can't lose. Doug splashes Earl, beats him down, choke, Irish whip splash Doug, choke with the boot in the corner, Irish whip to the corner and Doug misses the splash. Earl shoulders him in the corner, punches away, running clotheslines have no effect, and Doug side slams him. A dumb one foot cover only gets two. Snap suplex, bodyslam, leg drop from Doug gets two. Irish whip, crossbody from Earl is blocked, Earl tries a side kick instead, then does the flying headscissors to get a two count. NWQ is on the apron, LOW BLOW Fraze. Arm wringer Doug, pumphandle slam, cover gets two but he yanks him up by the hair twice. Uh, take your victory when you can else it could come back to bite ya. Earl punches Doug, Irish whip reversed and Earl is caught in a bearhug. Earl fights out of it, charges and gets caught again. Cash runs out and attacks Quinten, Fraze drops Grissom and screams at Cash, Earl with a schoolboy and the referee does a fast three count!

WINNER: Earl Grissom pin -> (6-6-0-1) 5:15 mins. *

Doug is pissed, Cash runs to the back, Doug follows, Cash sneaks back in the ring from another doorway. Sound is still crap as he's talking, calls Fraze. Fans are yelling behind me, someone else screams Cash sucks. Dang, when a fan can out yell a microphone, that's real bad. Cash calls for me, says something that I cannot understand, cause the sound sucks, even on tape it sucks, fans screaming ain't helping then some idiot makes a joke about a boyfriend's backside that gets my attention. What the heck was Cash trying to tell me anyway? He finally makes the expected knock-knock joke to put me out of my misery. Knock knock, who's there, CF, CF who, exactly CF who it's my show. He calls for Fraze some more, Doug comes in from the back. This girl won't stop screaming, uh oh Cash has the electric stun gun! Cash invites Doug in the ring, still can't hear over these fans and I begin looking for another seat closer to the speakers. Doug gets in, Cash knocks him down and intimidates the heck out of him with the shock gun while sitting on his chest. He reminds him that Doug cost him Guy Smith's title. Says something then presses the zapper, uses the zapper as a phone to communicate and scare Doug some more, then the music plays and Cash leaves. I'd enjoy this segment more if the sound wasn't out shouted by the crowd. Bing Westlake (who's on the 180-day disabled list with a torn ACL thanks to Dredd Walker) was griping at me cause he says he could hear everything just fine. Sure you could, you were sitting right under one of the speakers. Regardless, I wish the man behind the name and character a speedy recovery.

Central Illinois Championship
(c)"The UNDER Achiever" Billy Morgan (3-4) 5’10" 172lbs. Riverton, IL w/ Kev G, Cherry Malone & Morgan Security Guard JJ Tank vs. El Diablo Silverado (9-5) 5'8" 173lbs. Beardstown, IL - Morgan pretty much did what I predicted last month, steal the title with help from his rather large posse, but Malone ate a Juvy Driver for her troublemaking. Let's see if she listened this time to my advice, "you jump in the ring in the middle of a match, BAD THINGS WILL HAPPEN TO YOU." Silverado knocks down the security guys with a dive, Tank clotheslines EDS out the outside and they proceed to mug him. EDS comes back, Morgan on the top rope, dives and catches little of EDS but takes out his own guy Kev. Back in the ring, suplex Billy gets two. Turnaround top rope splash gets two. Billy with an Irish whip, EDS with a dropkick. Slam EDS gets two. Billy back body drops EDS over the top rope. Kev and JJ proceed to beat up EDS again and the referee FINALLY EJECTS both of them. Billy argues with the ref, EDS rolls him up for two. EDS with a Juvy Driver gets two. A leg drop from the second rope only gets two. Irish whip reversed Billy with a kick that gets a two count. Billy chokes away in the corner, Irish whip reversed and EDS eats a boot. Billy climbs to the top but EDS bounces against the ropes to crotch him, EDS kicks him off, hits a sloppy Silver Bullet (Unprettier), Malone who wasn't ejected earlier is up on the apron (well she didn't listen to my advice), the ref is over there and not counting the cover, JJ Tank runs back out with a chair and throws it in the ring for Morgan. Morgan has the chair, EDS sees him, he tosses him the chair and flops down, James Welden (figures) thinks he hit him with the chair and calls the cheapo DQ. Billy Morgan is NO Eddie Guerrero.

WINNER and STILL CHAMP: Billy Morgan DQ -> (4-4) 5:15 mins. ¾*

AHMT Round Three
Dredd Walker (9-5-1) 5'11" 210lbs. "Purgatory" vs. Tom Arson (5-6) 6'5" 260lbs. St. Louis, MO - Dredd virtually had a walk to the third round, being that his second round opposition was whacked by the cult. Arson has a four-match winning streak going. Arson's got his face and arms painted up like Al Snow as well as new music. Commentators have an Arson Sux sign. His T-Shirt says "My girlfriend rules cause I'm Tom Arson and you're not!" And there goes the dumb shout again. The message on his face says "Dredd Sux" and his arms say "Trend Setter". Tom with an arm wringer, Dredd trips the leg, kickaway, takedown Dredd, leg takedown Tom, rollup two, another one, trip by Tom gets two and they stand in a stalemate. Irish whip Dredd blocks the sunset flip to get two, Tom with a half crab but Dredd makes the ropes. Arm drag Dredd, Tom goes outside. Arson charges, Dredd rolls him up for two. Spinning heel kick Dredd, Tom goes out again, Dredd chases, Tom in and stomps Dredd. Irish whip, Dredd gets Arson in a flying crucifix cradle for two. Tom with a rake to the face. Tom charges but gets back body dropped outside. Dredd with a double axehandle, Dredd throws Arson head first into the post, then bites him on the forehead. Back in, Dredd with a turnbuckle smash, and spits on him. Suplex, Dredd keeps biting on the forehead, trying to cut him. Thankfully he doesn't bleed. Tilt-a-whirl slam Arson. Irish whip and Dredd eats a big boot for two. Tom with a chop, choke with the foot, chop. Dredd reverses to slug and kick away, whip and back body drop Dredd. Tom with a spinning leglock, but lets go. Irish whip and a double clothesline. Dredd to the top, missile drop kick. Dredd punches, kicks away, Arson with an eye poke, and a rope burn. Arson with a Russian leg sweep for two. Arson goes for the liberty spike piledriver, Dredd blocks it, back body drop. Dredd puts Tom on the top rope for a superplex, Tom knocks him down, and actually hits a moonsault! That only gets two though, he goes for it again, Dredd grabs him for the super belly to back suplex from the top rope and gets three! Boy that really hurt Arson, he was dropped on the back of his head. Dredd isn't done, he kicked and wiped his boot in his face. Arson is very slow to get up.

WINNER: Dredd Walker pin -> (10-5-1) 13:15 mins. ***½

El Pollo Loco (0-1-0-1) 5'9" 140lbs., Tijuana, Baja California, Mexico vs. Lucious P. Cotrane (4-3) 5’10" 230lbs. "Land of Lucious" - The kid since the last time he appeared put on fifteen pounds inside of a couple weeks, at least that's what his bio seems to imply yet he's still announced at 140lbs. Misprint? He also has moved to "Hatchling, AL", which does not appear anywhere on a map. Maybe there's some farm named Hatchling. This is a heavyweight vs. welterweight match, but making things more even for the small guy LPC is pretty much operating on a bad wheel, no thanks to Michael Shard. LPC has the mike, he welcomes us to the Land of Lucious. He was talking to EDS and he says EPL means "the crazy chicken". EPL squawks. LPC offers to help the new talent, he wants to show him how to do the chicken dance properly. EPL does his own version, LPC thinks he's not doing it right. LPC says hands, arms, legs, shake your tail, follow him. EPL still doesn't do it LPC's way, he says ah screw it. KICK WHAM STUNNER THIS CHICKEN IS FRIED!!! Bell didn't actually ring, but we'll assume the match started with the kick. The new guy didn't get a chance to wrestle that ALWAYS disappoints me. At least he isn't the one who’s lost the fastest fall.

WINNER: Lucious P. Cotrain pin -> (5-3) 8 seconds. DUD

AHMT Round Three
Michael Shard (7-9) 5'8" 160 lbs. Santa Monica, CA vs. Eric Logan (5-5) 5'10" 173lbs. Palm Springs, FL - These guys met in a match last year, when Logan was called "The Caddy" and Shard was under the management of Prof. Philip H. Dempsey. Surprised PHD hasn't signed on as anyone's manager yet. Anyway, Shard beat Logan with the cutting edge, but Shard who was screaming a lot about not getting another title shot got himself DQ'ed for unsportsmanlike conduct and ever since this thrown away match has been a constant lead weight as he struggles to stay afloat. Lockup to the corner, clean break but Shard slaps him. Lockup again to the corner, Eric slaps him back. Shard with another slap, they're arguing. Lockup, takedown Shard but they're still collar-and-elbowed together and they fall outside the ring. Back in, Logan with a takedown, Shard with a takedown, headlock takedown Logan, armlock, Shard reverses and gets two. Legdrop, snap mare Shard and he jumps on the top rope for a rest, Logan mocks him by doing the same. Shard forearm shot to the head, two suplexes gets a two count. Snap mare, dropkick, choke, rope burn, Irish whip to the corner bulldog Shard gets two. Shard chokes away, whip and an arm drag by Logan. Whip reverse back body drop Logan on the apron, Logan slides under Shard's feet, Eric with a crossbody and they tumble to the floor. Eric tosses him in, Shard kicks him in the nose. Brainbuster by Shard, a run of the ropes and they collide but Eric gets a rollup two. Snap mare Shard, kick to the back, choke on the ropes. Charge misses, crucifix attempt by Logan is blocked, Samoan Drop Shard gets two. Shard slugs away, Eric hits back, gets a knockdown. Billy Morgan comes out. Morgan sucks chant. El Diablo Silverado runs out and yanks him down. Shard is on the top rope, but Eric slams him off. EDS and Morgan are fighting to the back. WHEW, glad Morgan was prevented from messing this match up. Shard with a dropkick to the knee, twist of the leg, elbows to the knee, works the leg over. Shard puts him in the tree of woe. Baseball slide to the head misses and Shard crotches himself on the post. Logan with a moonsault gets two. Irish whip, Shard with a knee to the gut, a pair of dragon screw leg whips, a rolling leg vice, and baseball slide to the face. Shard has the leg, enzuigiri Logan. Logan slugs away, Irish whip, flapjack gets two. Shard with the flatliner, but that only gets two. Shard can't believe it, argues but gets rolled up for two. Shard with a small package, Logan reverses it and gets three! Really good match.

WINNER: Eric Logan pin -> (6-5) 15:50 mins. ****

Oh but Shard is mad, another flatliner! Shard puts him in the tree of woe again. Baseball slide to the head! Shard puts Logan in a half tartanula. Stan Sallinger runs out with a chair to break it up. Oh boy, Dredd Walker is going to face an injured Logan.

NMW Tag Team Championship
(c)Sage Ramsey (5-3) 6'4" 268lbs. Peoria, IL & Jason Wells (3-5) 6'0" 230lbs. Kansas City, MO (5-0-2) vs. The NEW Cult of RON (1-0) Kincaid, IL - Don't call me "The Khaos Kidd" no more Steven Bishop (2-7) 5'7" 200lbs. & I am "Anonymous" cause I don't want my name associated with RON (0-1) 5'11", 252lbs. - I don't feel like telling the wild story I've had in my battles with the cult leader, just to say unless you are a top guy in the WWF you should avoid playing your character 24-7 cause things can go very wrong. Both of RON's men got beat rather quick three weeks ago, Anonymous losing in two minutes, and Bishop in three. Boy the cat-calling is loud as RON shouts those are MY belts! Khaos Kidd is not doing the RTC look any more thankfully. Anonymous STILL doesn't have a gimmick name after all this time and I may start a new naming contest if this continues. Wells and Bishop start. Bishop with a kick, Irish whip, hip toss, an inverted spinning neckbreaker into the knee! Ouch. Wells with a clothesline, powerbomb, leg drop, Irish whip clothesline. Tag Sage. Double forward Russian leg sweep. Sage with a headbutt, suplex, bodyslam, legdrop gets two. Tag Wells. Double suplex, Bishop's getting squashed. Rear chinlock by Wells, side slam gets two. Irish whip to the corner, splash, Wells to the middle rope, Vader Bomb, DDT. Tag Sage. Belly to back suplex Sage, elbow drop, headbutt, Irish whip boot to the face, two legdrops. Tag Wells. Irish whip side slam Wells gets two. Irish whip to the corner, Kidd trips Wells with a drop toe hold to the turnbuckle. Tag Anonymous. Double inverted DDT gets a one count. Anonymous with a suplex into the jackhammer! Hey that's Goldberg's finisher! That somehow only gets a two count. Wells gets a jawbreaker. RON on the apron, Bishop in for an illegal switch, Russian leg sweep. Kidd to the top, Wells bounces on the ropes to crotch him, superplex Wells. Bishop manages to tag out first, Anonymous jumps in to knock Sage off and cover for a two count. Powerslam Anonymous, tag Bishop. Spinning splash Kidd, RON gets on the apron again, illegal switch, Sage is knocked off. Suplex Anonymous, small package Wells gets two. Tag Kidd, the ref gets hit somehow. Irish whip reversed clothesline Wells, Kidd goes to the top and gets caught in a spinebuster. "RON is dead!" chant. Wells goes to the top, hits a moonsault but can't cover. Everyone tags, Sage with multiple clotheslines, spinebuster on Anonymous, chokeslam on Kidd, RON's on the apron AGAIN. Anonymous is fighting Wells on the floor, and hits him repeatedly with a chair. In the ring Sage tries to throw Bishop at RON but is reversed and Sage is hit with the book in the back of the head. Sage no-sells it however, and RON empties a can of mace in his face and Bishop steals the titles by highway robbery. Wells is back in with a chair and hits someone with it.

WINNER and NEW CHAMPS: The NEW Church of RON pin -> (2-0) 15:55 mins. ***

"Big Man on Campus" Garret Ryan (1-0) 6'2" 232lbs. Carbondale, IL vs. "Toga" Steve Fisher (2-3) 5'10" 240lbs. Carbondale, IL - Well let's see if we have a match this time. Last month they had a drinking contest in lieu of an actual match. I did a search to see if there was an actual fraternity named Sigma Omega Beta somewhere recently and found that there is a Sigma Omega, a sorority called Beta Sigma Omega, another fraternity called Beta Omega Sigma, but there does appear to be a Sigma Omega Beta group at Ohio University. "Totally Obliterate Garret's A**"! Toga has the mike, tells Garret everything's not quite right. He goes through many memorable nights at various watering holes, we've had time to cool off, and wants Ryan to come out. Toga discusses their battles, and they should be the tag champs right now cause no one can hold a candle to us. Let's get back together and go after the belts. They shake hands. Toga says though for just one time that we get it out of our systems and have a match. Whew, thought they were gonna cancel it again. Lockup, hip toss Ryan. Lockup, slam Toga. Lockup, slam Ryan. Slam Toga. These guys are circling a lot. Lockup, Toga is tossed outside. Lockup, arm wringer Ryan, reversed, Toga tosses Ryan out. Trading of slaps. Ryan takes Toga to the corner, ref is shoved to the mat (DQ?), Toga with a chop, charge to the corner misses, rollup Ryan gets two. Small package Toga gets two. Inverted atomic drop, Toga clotheslines Ryan out. Ryan with a head yank on the top rope, stompaway, Irish whip powerslam Ryan. Ryan puts on a rear chinlock but twists at Toga's face. Pickup, back drop Toga, shoulderblock, Irish whip SALUKI Hammer Toga gets two. LOW BLOW Ryan. Irish whip reversed back body drop Toga, Irish whip Ryan with a spinebuster gets two. Slugaway Ryan, Irish whip side slam gets two. Corner punches from Ryan, Irish whip reversed, sloppy spinebuster from Toga, he slugs away. Irish whip clothesline Toga, whip to the corner Toga eats a boot. Ryan attempts a sunset flip, Toga sits on him hooks the legs and wins it. Slow start to the match that got into a big brawl at the end.

WINNER: Toga Steve pin -> (3-3) 9:15 mins. **½

After the match, Toga chants, Steve wants to shake hands, Garret doesn't want to, finally he does and CLOTHESLINES him down! Ryan stomps him down, yanks him up, SAKULI SLAM (Alabama Slam)! Demands the ref count the pin, which he does but it doesn't count. Ryan spits on him. So much for beefing up that thin tag division, the frat boys would’ve SQUASHED the cult again. Toga is slow to leave but has a beer.

"New World" Quinten Tyler (0-1) 5'11", 230lbs. Denver, CO w/ Emily Darling vs. Scotty Cash (5-4) 5'9" 170lbs. 'Yo Mommas House' - I redid Quinten's logo in red for his color scheme, the new entrance video makes a white fade to red. Cash's video is that of a million dollar bill. Quinten REALLY hated that "Impeach [name deleted]" sign so much that I just gave it to him to rip up if it would make him feel better. Cash nudges Emily and throws some fries. Quinten yells don't touch my girl again or I'll beat the **** out of you! Hmmm...Cash said he'll beat Quinten in one minute lets start the timer. Lockup, slap by Cash, NWQ bails, Cash chases. Irish whip, clothesline Cash, bodyslam, Cash back body drops Quinten over the top. Oops, it's over a minute now. Emily comes over to chew out Cash, Quinten hits Cash on the outside, toss in, whip hip toss NWQ gets ONE. Slam NWQ, legdrop gets one. DDT NWQ gets two. QT whip, belly to belly suplex gets two. Irish whip blocked, Cash with what a fan calls the "ball buster". Whip reversed Cash goes over the top, NWQ chokes on the outside, toss in, two suplex are hit before the third is blocked for Cash to hit one of his own. Chokehold, spinebuster Cash. Cash to the top, double leg drop gets two as Doug Fraze comes out of nowhere to interrupt and yank the referee out. ISN'T THAT AN AUTOMATIC DQ ANYMORE? Fraze chairshots Cash, rolls Quinten on top, throws the referee back in and he counts the pin? Fraze continues to beat Cash with the chair and side slams him on it. He picks him up and does another side slam on the chair! Fraze SCREAMS at him, you my friend are INJURED!

WINNER: "New World" Quinten Tyler pin -> (1-1) 6:05 mins. *

NMW Heavyweight Championship
(c)"NMW Alpha Male, MPW Heavy Hitter, Fans All Female" Guy Smith (11-5) 6'0" 255lbs. Rapid City, SD w/ Emily Darling vs. Overthrown President Battlin' Stan Sallinger (0-3) 6'3", 260lbs. Springfield, IL - Your referee is Real World Jeremy, who's full career lifetime singles win loss record is...(24-7-1). Now if some of the other guys would think back to the first two years of the MWA era of NMW and recall their match histories, I'm curious as to how they did back then. Smith had hit Stan Sallinger with a chair a month ago causing Stan & Logan to lose to Doug Fraze & Quinten, which apparently set up this match. Someone has a sign that says "I'm here to **** with the NMW short bus!" What the heck is that supposed to mean? There are some others who get up and leave, not because they're bored, but because they actually have to go to work by 10pm! Some nutjob that claims to be "the untouchable" writes an over 300 word message that can be said in only three words: "SHUT UP CF!!!" Doesn't like what I write, yet he still reads the thing. Unbelievable. I can only imagine what a professional like Scott Keith goes through on a daily basis where he gets paid to write reviews and books. Guy stalls like mad, as RWJ wants to check him for weapons, Emily says she'll check him over, but RWJ butts in and find a chain. Lockup, Stan shoves Guy across the ring. Guy with a knee, headlock, Stan with an atomic drop sends Guy outside. Eight count. Headlock Stan, shoveoff, Guy catches the boot and flips Stan over. Kick'em slug'em Guy, clawhold to the gut that Stan completely no-sells, swinging full-nelson slam. Guy bails out once again, RWJ gets to NINE and opts not to let it end on a countout, Stan goes after him, Guy hides behind Emily but RWJ throws him back in. Guy stomps away, suplex, stomp gets one. Turnbuckle smash, whip to the corner, Stan eats a boot. Guy with a moonsault that misses, but he lands on his feet and hits Stan with a dropkick. Chokes away with the boot, RWJ counts to five, but yanks Guy off instead of DQ'ing him. Stan trips Guy into the second rope, then tries a laughable 619 which fails miserably. Guy misses a crossbody, Stan misses a missile dropkick from the top, Guy hits three straight elbowdrops for a two count. Belly to belly suplex Guy gets two. Samaon Drop by Stan gets two. Stan does a MOONSAULT and gets two. Guy with the bonazi drop gets two. Guy mimics The Rock and hits the Rock Bottom for 2½! Guy slugs away, Stan mimics Hulk Hogan and hulks up from the punches and wags his finger in Guys face. Guy just slaps him and does the death valley driver that gets two. Guy argues the count and decides to punch RWJ, RWJ blocks his punches and KICK WHAM PEDIGREES him! Doug Fraze and Quinten run out to the ring, RWJ knocks them both out. Stan up, spinning full-nelson slam GETS THREE! MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR UPSET!

WINNER and NEW CHAMP: Stan Sallinger pin -> (1-3) 12:30 mins. ***

What the heck?! Oh it was too good to be real. [Name deleted] comes riding out on her broomstick, casts an evil spell, and magically makes the belt disappear from Sallinger and reappear on Smith's waist. [Name deleted] screams bloody murder at Jeremy and reverses the title change. BAM! Quinten blasts RWJ with a chair, KICK WHAM PEDIGREE! Smith jams the chair into his knee again. Cash runs in, attacks everyone, Fraze gets the better of him though, Smith still works over the knee, LAST RIDE on Cash! [Name deleted] flies off on her broom. The heels continue to beatdown RWJ, Stan and Cash. Security jumps in the ring, Smith is still working the knee over, Fraze chokes away, several drink bottles are being thrown at the heels, security gets the chair away and forces them to leave. Dusty finish all over this one. [Name deleted] flies BACK to the ring, Guy Smith has the mike. One bottle finally hits the target. Surprised no one got ejected with all the trash being thrown. How's your knee Real World? That's what happens, cause he's the alpha male, he's the champ, he's head and shoulders above everyone so next month he will finally defend again RWJ. Uh, what if Dredd Walker wins the next match? When will he be getting his shot? At Free Admission II? [Name deleted] needs to be overthrown no question about it. ¼* deducted for the retarded finish.

WINNER and STILL CHAMP: "Alpha Male" Guy Smith DQ -> (12-5) 12:30 mins. **¾

AHMT Final Round
Eric Logan (6-5) 5'10" 173lbs. Palm Springs, FL vs. Dredd Walker (10-5-1) 5'11" 210lbs. "Purgatory" - Wonder what condition Logan's in, he's running to the ring, but no moonsault entrance into the ring as he's limping. Big trophy at the commentator's table. If Dredd wins he is the #1 contender and gets a shot at Smith. Lockup shove down Dredd, twice. Logan shoves him back. Dredd with an armbar, whip elbow, clothesline, arm drag, hip toss. Eric lands on his feet, arm drag, drop kick. Eric charges for a dive but fakes out Dredd, hops off the top rope for a crossbody to the floor, toss in gets two. Whip Logan, Dredd clips the knee and goes to work on it. Dredd shoves PT Starbody, showing some aggression. Half crab applied, then plants the foot in the back of the knee and stomps it. Dredd legscissors the knee, Logan's screaming, but he lets go! Why? A kick to the gut, butterfly suplex by Dredd gets two. Logan gets a flying headscissors, hurraconranna, hops on Dredd's shoulders but eats a facebuster! Dredd says he's using his head. Dredd goes back to work on the right knee. Leg snap, whip spinning heel kick by Dredd gets two. Frustration is showing. Eric put on the top rope, chop to the chest, Eric slaps Dredd and shoves him. Flying hurraconranna attempt but Eric takes most of the damage yet still gets two. Pickup, whip Samoan Drop by Logan. Standing moonsault by Logan gets two, handspring off the ropes into a splash gets two. Second one misses. A chair just collapses on a man sitting close by me. Ouch. Dredd with a powerbomb. Logan with a drop kick. Eric signals 217 (619), tries it but doesn't get his legs through the ropes and gets nailed. Dredd tries a suplex, shoulderblock Logan, sunset flip blocked, Logan is thrown on his back for two. Slugaway Dredd, Logan with a rollup, small package Dredd gets two. Dredd whip to the corner, misses the charge, clothesline Logan. Sets Dredd in position, to the top, Orange Crush (turnaround senton)! That just gets two. Logan's up again, powerbomb attempt by Dredd, Logan with a facebuster. Back to the top goes Logan, SHOOTING STAR PRESS!!! IT'S ALL OVER!!!

WINNER of the Alexis Homeier Memorial Tournament: Eric Logan pin -> (7-5) 11:10 mins. ***¾

No title shot for Dredd next month. El Diablo Silverado and Stan Sallinger come to the ring with the trophy. Dredd is dejected. Logan holds up the trophy. Logan offers to shake hands, Dredd refuses to shake and leaves. Show over.

A much better show than last month, but that [name deleted] woman is REALLY getting on my nerves. Next month’s lineup is a double-header weekend, Guy Smith defends against Real World Jeremy, but as for the rest of the lineup, it looks to be Billy Morgan vs. Eric Logan for the CI Title, a rematch between the cult and Ramsey & Wells, and Fraze vs. Cash.

Alexis Homeier Memorial Tournament
July 26 2K3